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What love can do to a man who has given up on life. It changes him, gives him life and makes him feel living is worth it. even if in another world. love, of any form, can move mountains. i wish i had that choice, to close my eyes, turn into a tall, slim blue person with tail and live in a fluorescent world. a world where people are content, they are happy with however little they have, to be with their loved ones. there isn't a stressful desire to aim, to achieve, at such a speed. where there isn't such a hurry, less worries.

i too, had an aim. PhD before 30. then, when i 'announced' that, i had about 6 years to achieve. now, i have 3. it's unachievable now. should i beat myself up over it? i did for awhile but things don't always work out the way you want it too. life isn't just about your career. things happen and some things have to be neglected. what can wait and what can't. it's all in the timing. most things in life is about timing. at that instance, weighing up what's more important. got to give some to gain some, right. sometimes i wonder if i hadn't work hard enough to want it a couple of years back, that knowing what i know today, i should have concentrated more on that area of my life instead. today, 2010, i think my chances of doing it has doubled, i don't and can't do it anymore. irony of life.

...sometimes your whole life boils down to one insane move...